The Truth will set you Free

Faith is everything. It is by faith that we can attain our deepest desire and goal.
Mundane and dry knowledge cannot go there, they do not have access to the sweetness we so crave.
This body and mind are part of the world that comes and goes. A baby is born, she grows, she matures, she reproduces, she grows old, and then dies.
Why am I here? And what animates this material body?

The soul. The soul is separate from from all these decaying things. It is explained that we have a gross material body, and beneath that we have a subtle body. Our gross body is comprised of the five material elements, ether, air, fire, water, and earth. This subtle body is comprised of our intelligence, mind, and false ego. Our subtle body is shaped by the impressions of our lives.
When this gross body no longer works, we go to another body, and by our deeds and impressions, nature decides the appropriate placement. It is more like changing clothes, and we'll be surprised to learn it at the time of death! Prabhupada said "It is as if I were dreaming, when I wake up there is still "I" but the same body isn't there."
Beneath our subtle body is the soul, described as one ten thousandth of a tip of a hair.
It's like a coconut, the skin being the body, the white fruit the subtle body, and the juice the soul.
Who is this soul? Do I know my own soul at all? And where exactly is it trying to go?


These are questions that lead one on the search for Truth, which in Absolute form is Krsna as the Supreme personality of God. It's hard for us to imagine that there is one root to the diverse expressions and expansions of life. It's like a huge banyan tree, the canopies used to be miles long!
When we see one part of one leaf, it's hard to imagine the branch upon which is rests, what to speak of the root? That doesn't mean it's not there. But when we start wondering how this leaf gets its greenness and it life, it's nourishment, we start to follow one leaf to another, branch to trunk, trunk to root. This is the way to inquire.
And when we see a tree reflected in water, the roots are actually up, and this is the way reality is, truth comes down. Our position is more like the flickering reflection but in our conditioned state the gross material tree seems more real with our material senses.

For so long I had the idea that I was the master, that I was the subject. I've slowly come into the realization that in fact I am the object and Krsna is the Supreme subject. He is the Energetic, and I am the energy. When I move my arm, that is energy, but I have to direct it to do so.
Everything is emanating from him. This is very hard to understand, and it's only the tip of the iceberg. This entire planet in fact has a root, this root is in India and in my relentless search I came to somehow know it as such.

My life has changed and daily my consciousness is being reformed. It's fascinating to look back. It's amazing to hear the stories of people from every corner of the world and how they came to be here.
It's like coming home or rather coming upon the road to home. I lived on this planet thinking that everything must remain a mystery. Even though I was always searching, I feel there was some innate assumption that I wouldn't find anything. I had no idea I could actually find everything I was looking for. I had no idea I could find real answers to the questions we all have. Furthermore, having found it means having had the faith and humility and mercy to accept it, which I never imagined I had. But still, I have so very little otherwise I wouldn't be in the conditioned state I'm in. Of course, the road to Truth isn't easy or free of doubt.

Everybody's gotta serve somebody, remember that Dylan song? Can we live on earth without serving? Have you tried? Service is actually the constitutional position of the soul, it yearns to serve but we just can't figure out what it is/who it is we really yearn to serve. My soul, part an parcel of the Supersoul, yearns to serve him and his inner potency Radha, the most merciful.

Coming to find my Gurudeva has given me everything, in the fullest sense of the word. I don't even understand the extent of it, and only have deep faith and experience which tells me my very soul is in his hands. How strange and scary this sounds to the western world. How completely foreign it must seem. Yet, Guru, the giver, is the oldest and truest way of approaching the Truth. In the same way, had I never met my father I would have to take my mother's word concerning his identity. I must also accept the word of the greater authority who is in a position of knowing why I am here.

This isn't a blind process. It's painfully lucid. You inquire, and you are given answers, it's up to you to decide how satisfied you are with them. If you're not satisfied, if your heart doesn't start dancing and spinning, in joy and in bewilderment, then perhaps you are still on the search.

Gurudeva said himself that if a Guru cannot clear the doubt of a disciple he is not a bonafide Guru. It is very rare to find. How could someone as undeserving as I ever come under his shelter and upon my life's goal?

Karma. You know, it's a word my parents used to use when I was young. I sort of took it for granted in the same way we take all the significant sayings. "What goes around, comes around" "Treat others as you'd want to be treated"
Every action has an equal and opposite reaction indeed. What I choose to do in this life creates impressions for my next. It's amazing when you start to deeply ask yourself why you're here, but it's even more amazing when you touch upon answers that start waking up what you already knew.
You start to wonder, how did this happen so quickly, as if it was always there?
Ah! but it was, only covered.

Still, we are covered by this false ego. Even when I found out I wasn't this body and that I travel through many lives and forms to seek my creator, and relationship with him, I still have an enormous task ahead of me. At this stage of realization it is mixed with intellect, and not yet of pure heart.
So through actions we acquire reactions. And until we decide we want to inquire about this process, we will continue to experience the rewards of pious activities and pains of sinful activities. In the Vedas (the oldest/eternal scriptures) all these things are given. There is actually more than one heaven and hell, and more than that there is something much greater than heaven. The heavens still reside in the material creations.

So what have I been doing for the past month?

Drinking the sweet nectar of the Truth... or trying to! Chanting the holy names which give freedom from the cycle of karma. The mind is restless going from one thing to another, always forgetting God. So in this age of Kali (time of quarrel and hypocrisy) the only way to control the mind is to chant the Holy names of Krsna.

It is not our aim to get rid of the senses as many impersonalists believe. We believe the senses are real, and directed properly can give the greatest joy and gift of life. In fact, the human body is meant for such inquiry.
So we are redirecting our senses to the spiritual realities. It is said that knowledge and renunciation are not the highest paths. Devotion is, that is Bhakti, pure loving devotion to Radha Krsna, the divine couple. Everything is for them. They are our everything.
Relationship is real, love is real, it's only our focus which is wrong. It's only our aim to take and not to give which gets us trapped.

On this planet we can only exploit. No matter how hard we try, and I sincerely tried as an environmentalist, we cannot escape exploitation.

Why is this?

This planet is actually the place of exploitation. Even in more pure times, we're still exploiting and we're still killing in the name of our own pleasure, as our own masters who want to enjoy this life in some way.
I'm on a path of realizing nothing is mine, and if I use everything in the service of Gurudeva and the Absolute Truth, then transcendentally I can begin to approach the Truth which is my soul's desire. It's actually a blessing to be in Kali Yuga, when every moment we see the decay of cultures, countries, traditions, relationships, land, etc. Because of this obvious suffering we are in a position to see it quickly and ask, why?

By the way there are four ages (yugas) on this material planet, four, just like the seasons. We're in the last one, which is the worst, at the end of this one, after the submergence of water and purification, the cycle continues from the purest age, the Age of Truth.

The soul never dies, it only travels based on its actions. If it reaches the spiritual sky, it never leaves or comes back to the material worlds.

During the pure age, people know why they're here. They know this planet is more like an airport than a destination and spiritual life is like breathing. To many people in India it still is like breathing. From morning to night the purpose of one's life is to serve God and attain his abode. This is in fact the meaning of Yoga, to unite, we are in a position to choose what we want, this is the free will we have.
If we want to enjoy material existence, we're allowed for as long as we want. Eventually, we get frustrated, and through our sins and fruitless search we cultivate an aversion to the way we've been living. Somethings missing, no? And then, knock knock, and doors open, wherever you are on your journey, that spiritual door opens.

So, we've been chanting, and hearing Hari-Katha, hearing the divine transcendental pastimes of the Lord. These are enacted by him 5000 yrs ago in India, as an exact replication of those activities in the spiritual realm. Krsna comes to remind us why we're here.
By hearing and walking to the holy places we begin to develop our spiritual senses and pray deeply that a drop of mercy will touch us so that we may truly understand what is being given by Gurudeva.
For a month we spent our days walking barefoot through the streets and villages of Vrndavan and Govardhan. After a beautiful month we will now spend some time in the ashram serving and learning more in a concentrated intimate environment. We met great people from all over the world and have more invitations than we could dream of fulfilling at this point!

These are just some of my thoughts. I don't know who is reading and I never aim to offend anyone, this is some of the Truth as I've come to understand it, repeated from those authorities I pay my obeisances to. I hope it brings you some joy and more questions ;) By the way, part of what brought me here was the spiritual tool called the "enneagram" it goes about showing you nine basic personality types, which also has roots in the Vedas, when you see that every ninth person is just like you, you start really wanting to know who is beyond this ego. Again, may sound far out but it served as catalyst to my awakening. Infinitely more important than that I recommend the Bhagavad-Gita As it is by A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada.

It's in the nature of the mind to accept and reject. It's humbling to remember all the things we rejected before greater understanding we then accepted. Even if God stood right in front of us, we wouldn't recognize him, because we don't have the proper eyes. Imperfect senses produce imperfect conclusions. I aim to seek perfection through surrender. One sweet life, I pray to completely surrender to the Truth.
Truth means: to remember.

What are you trying to remember?

Hare Krsna